Other than walking backwards, I found a new video that seems to have some very good videos for knee repair:
Also, I saw this video a long time ago and it did not work great but I still want to reference it in case I want to try them again at some point:
I’ve been at a loss as to how to get more stretch in my knees, but I got some inspiration recently from this video:
Lots of cool ideas in this video. Specifically with rolling the knees back and forth.
I feel that this might require something more in terms of exercise, some knee strength somehow to stabilize the knees more, but I feel this is a big part of the puzzle.
This morning I feel damn tired. And I feel stressed.
I know I have to pack my bags for home, check into my flight, and cook all the raw food in the fridge.
I also want to play more Valorant since I never have time for more than 2 or 3 games without interrupting my bedtime. I finally placed an alt account in Silver 1 and I’m loving it, not having to think very hard, just play for the fun of it.
I would also love to work on my French challenge and spend some time with the mimic technique. I was thinking last night about using connection theory to understand what it would take to think in French, instead of just being really good at translating in my head from English to French and the answer that came to me is that I just need to mimic a lot of French speakers, and not just mimic what they say, but how they say it.
Also, for today, right after my morning run, I would like to continue and finish my next section of my VOD review and perhaps plan out some posts for my art coach Instagram.
Just came back from my run and I have to say, I want to be out there more. A walk out in the world is a wonderful way to think through stuff.
A Sacred Thing
The biggest disservice that they did me
Was getting me onto the ideal of controlling
How others feel about me
Because controlling how others feel
Puts ME into a cage as well
The mask of their surface wants
Is forced upon my face
And I would trade my freedom
For their approval any day
I think, as I walk past people
That how someone feels about you
Is a sacred thing
There is no need to change how they feel about us
Just as much as we can seek to understand not control our own feelings
To look upon the world
Without fear
Means to own the world again
I feel worried about posting about this topic since it can be kind of gross.
However, I feel that physical health is one of the most important things to understand in life as it controls your energy levels, affects your mental strength, and dramatically affects your physical attractiveness or beauty.
Tracking and problem solving my health issues will not only help me but may provide inspiration for others.
Symptoms: bloating, gas, diarrhea, distended belly, sensitivity to cold, stress, and exhaustion
Brainstorm:
Current Focus:
I need to improve my baseline before going after a specific treatment plan. The baseline will focus on two basic areas: overall circulation, reducing strain. The goals need to be very small so they are easy to maintain.
Symptoms: thin hair (but seems to be thickening), itchy scalp, hair falling out, dandruff
Very strange that my hair is thickening but falling out at the same time. Pretty sure my massage is working but the new hair growing in is so thin it falls out easily.
Brainstorm:
Current Focus:
I need to cleanse and increase circulation
Symptoms: afraid to put pressure or impact, no feeling at surgery area, pain
Brainstorm:
Current focus:
I need more circulation
Symptoms: jutting forward head, misaligned hips, shoulders rounded forward
Brainstorm:
Current focus:
I need to see a chiropractor and also just slightly improve posture while doing things bad for posture (computer, phone):
Symptoms: dry eyes, headaches (happens not very often), worsening vision
Brainstorm:
Current Focus:
I want to just relax my eyes more when looking at far away things, rather than trying to move closer.
There was a big journey I went down in terms of working on myself, becoming more mature and being able to live a free and meaningful life.
But I realized that they are all part of the same things and have different parts to play.
In a way, everything is about not abandoning yourself and taking care of yourself. You surround yourself with people who you can talk about what is on your mind truthfully and emotionally. They help you understand what you need. You are able to then give yourself what you need and walk down further along the path of understanding different parts of yourself that are in pain.
From processing emotions, we can truly love ourselves, and the people around us, and be present in the moment.
There is a sense that being with people who don’t accept us, don’t allow us to feel safe speaking our truth is self abandoment. In a way, even if someone meets some of our needs (for example is attractive enough to make us feel special), if we settle for someone who doesn’t love us or allow us to be ourselves, we are putting ourselves down.
Not allowing ourselves to meet our own needs (for example, asking for validation from others because we refuse to give it to ourselves) is self abandonment.
Refusing to look deeper, and shielding parts of ourselves from the world (for example, keeping a confident outward appearance when we feel anxious) is abandoning parts of ourselves and placing the outside world’s comfort above our own.
This is definitely one of the most difficult challenges I’ve undergone in a while.
I’ve tried a couple of things and I feel frustrated.
The Reaching for the Untouchable
The frustration
The reaching in my heart
Is getting to me
Reaching for the untouchable
I wonder if I will ever know
The doubt creeps
I seek to know
And when I rush there
There is still nothing
Frustration in my chest
Like a roar that wants to escape
But is trapped behind bars
I have created multiple messages to my girlfriend in French, multiple times I’ve tried to imitate. I feel like imitation is the key, but I grow tired of seeing no results. I feel tired and frustrated.
I feel angry and unhappy.
I suspect failure is such a hard thing for me to grasp. It is such a tough pill to swallow.
I saw a video with a lot of potential:
It is about learning jiujitsu really fast. But really it is about learning. He talks about many ideas in the video, ideas that I’ve myself considered. Ideas that I think are pretty profound and helpful:
He mentions some really interesting sounding books:
Anyway, I feel if I were to embrace my fear of failure, I need to meditate on it, but also come up with a plan.
I first want to come up with the plan to train From to Leave Form…and be repetitive about the most common words in French, say them until they are second nature.
So what are the top most common 10 words in French:
But these words are too basic. What about the top 10 most common phrases?
Ok that is a little better, but what about the most common French verbs?
Aller
Means “to go” and is also used to describe the near future tense.
Avoir
Means “to have” and is used to express possession, relationships, physical and mental states, and many other contexts.
Être
Means “to be” and indicates the action or state of being.
Pouvoir
Means “can” or “to be able to”. It’s an irregular verb like prendre or faire, belonging to the third group.
Savoir
Used to indicate knowledge or understanding. It can also be used in many idiomatic expressions, such as “savoir-faire” (know-how).
Mettre
Means “to put” but can also be used for dropping someone off somewhere, laying the table, taking time to do something, laying a carpet.
Prendre
Means “to take”, including “to travel” on particular forms of transport. It is also used for having meals.
Venir
Means “to come”, and it can be easily used to conjugate the recent past or convey the idea that you have just done something recently.
Vouloir
Often translated as to want and to wish in English, as its main usage is to express desires and wishes.
I want to read more about verbs in French but it is too late and I need to go to bed.
I just had a realization. I was thinking about what I “should” be doing in the mornings with this new blog commitment. But I think that EXACTLY what I “should” be doing.
I want to spend my time asking questions. And if an action speaks to me, I will do it.
In fact, this was a major technique in Connection Theory that I forgot about. Connection Theory is about understanding is the pathway to change.
One technique for understanding is to ask many many questions. Very good, specific questions. Questions that beget more questions.
Through questioning, we begin to understand.
Another technique I used to do was to ask myself questions. Imagine myself older and wiser, and come up with questions to ask my current day self, and then answer those questions.
Anyway, I have to transition to work, so this will have to wait for now.