I’ve had knee problems for my half of my life. I wanted to get the motivation to heal the knee. It started with the Knee Mobility Challenge, which by the way wasn’t even my first knee challenge. Then I started to work on my overall fitness and knee motivation with the JiuJitsu challenge.
This is sort of a continuation of that.
My current goals:
Lift up my knee and bend it feeling stable, comfortable and strong
Stand for 5 minutes while feeling comfortable
Lay on either side feeling comfortable and relaxed
Sit on my heels while feeling comfortable and relaxed
Be able to jump feeling stable, comfortable, and strong
Able to kick a roundhouse while feel stable, comfortable and strong
I’ve been feeling pretty lost as of late. I am thinking about my youtube channel, about my job, about coaching, about my health and about my challenges with youtube and fitness. I’ve been stressed out about all these different things and I don’t really know how to tackle all of them at the same time. I don’t know what to focus on, which ones makes sense to put energy into, and how I will go about focusing on any of these things.
I’ve been feeling depressed, overwhelmed and depleted, constantly self medicating with youtube videos and games.
Recently, I’ve been inspired by this video:
Health is everything. If you want to be a successful entrepreneur, you don’t have to choose between that and health. You will be a better entrepreneur with better health.
I want to drop all of my other challenges and focus on this for a while.
I want to focus on my health.
I thought about what this meant for quite a while because health is such a nebulous topic. I feel that Brian Johnson in project Blueprint is taking a very scientific approach to health, but I want to take a more personal approach.
Here are the areas that I care about:
Mood: How positive and happy I feel overall
Passion for life: How motivated I feel about life, relationships and projects
Energy: How energetic and strong I feel
Flow: how in the moment and attuned to my body’s sensations I feel
Attractiveness: how healthy I look
Some ideas of times that I can measure these things:
When I wake up: great for seeing how well I slept
Around 10 AM: good for checking up on my morning routine
Around 3 PM: good for checking on my afternoon routine
Before I go to bed: good to seeing the cumulative effect of the day and how fulfilled I feel
I’ve tried these type of challenges before, but I feel that I sort of neglected the mental part of health, feeling healthier physically but mentally trapped and unhappy. I want to really commit to doing video journaling this entire time in order to make sure that I can express myself and work through mental challenges.
What would mean success to me is not just feeling much more happy, passionate, energetic, in flow and attractive, but also to create a lifestyle, mindset and routine that will maintain and grow that over time.
Today I had a strategy session with my brother who is almost at the rank I want to be (Plat) about major mindset shifts I need to do to get out of Bronze and Silver.
Here are the main areas we came up with:
Learn to play off of contact better:
Swing when you see teammates swinging
If you see someone holding, pre-aim and get ready to trade
Crosshair placement and preaiming
Holding for wide swing vs close
Methodical clearing
Ability usage
Have gameplan for ability usage for the beginning of every attack and defending round
My peace is disrupted, again. Today I have to get up even earlier and start preparation for work even earlier because I have to travel, and get on the plane for an early morning flight.
I am frustrated because of the complete stinginess in the finances, I have a lot of stress in terms of asking for a better setup such as traveling the day beforehand.
As a result, I didn’t sleep very well (if at all), and now feel tired and stressed.
I have a couple of things working in favor today though:
Because I woke up at 4:30 for a flight that boards at 6:40, I do have some nice free time in the morning where I can spend on myself and reconnecting with myself
I get to do my favorite thing of sleeping on the plane
Howling Winds in My Heart
I feel the howling winds
In my heart
The internal blizzard
Unforgiving
Being buried my a mountain
Of worry
The pain of the winds
In my ears
Today I did this. I felt much better afterwards, especially after the breaths. Those are really important as I discovered with the Bea Mackay and Wim Hoff methods. Saying the “I Love You” felt strange, especially since I’ve been feeling that I don’t like my face recently, just thinking I gained too much weight, but saying them I think I did feel the anxiety go away and I feel much more at peace, less stressed about work and everything.
In my Valorant journey right now, I’m very interested in perfecting strafe shooting and proper clearing.
I heard that one of the elements of getting really good is about focusing on fewer things. What I’m really working on right now is getting something out of my warmups.
I usually play deathmatch until I feel like I’m hitting my shots and then jump into a match. But, now I’m thinking I need to let go of trying to push off from the confidence in a good deathmatch and instead working on making the mechanics more intuitive…meaning I need to deathmatch until I can hit shots even if I’m not match mvp, my clears, peeks and jiggles feel COMFORTABLE. Even if that means going into some deathmatches where it is really hard and everyone on taps me. The point of warmup should be when I feel like I’m not having trouble hitting shot anymore.
This might fall into my Valorant challenge but it goes much deeper.
I started trying to find a way to multitask in Valorant, which led me to thinking about confidence. This led me down a whole path where I was trying to understand how to focus on the game and get into the game, and get into flow.
I finally arrived at a technique that looks something like this:
See the enemy
Imagine their head getting shot
Aim
Shoot
This works for drills, deathmatch anything. The point is that you visualize the outcome first, then take some action (aiming). You don’t immediately aim, you don’t shoot as soon as you visualize.
This does a couple of things:
Visualizing hitting the headshot removes anxiety because in my head I can hit the shot
Visualization makes me focus on one target and give it my full attention
Aiming makes sure I actually hit the shot
On top of this, I can do anything to aim, I can use my movement to aim, I can center my screen, I can do literally anything, the important part is to visualize the headshot before it happens.
In a very interesting turn of events, I’ve actually found this super helpful in music too.
Oftentimes my singing is muddy and unclear. I’ve done something similiar:
Chop the notes into shorter more enunciated syllables
Savor and taste each note
Imagine how I want the note to taste
This does something similar where I am more aware of each note and can sing it with more intention and emotion. I don’t skip ahead too fast, I focus on each word as it comes.
It seems that a combination of a focus on a small step, and visualization helps bring me into the present moment.
