Workpost 67: Feeling a little scattered

Results from day 3 while tired and a little stressed.

Match 1

Reflections:

1. My mind is kind of sluggish, but this way of working where I’m warming up, then taking breaks to walk is genuinely very relaxing. I don’t feel tired at all from the work.

Result Calculation:

1. How much do I think this work is worth? I feel this work was worth less maybe $100. I feel like there were some programmer heavy tasks in here but not a huge amount was accomplished.
2. How difficult intellectually was this work from 1-10? I’d say this work was middling difficulty. Maybe around a 4. It was deceptively simple in the sense that it’s very basic information added, but takes a bit of thinking.
3. What percentile do I place this work in terms of innovation? 5%. Not very innovative, business as usual.
4. Gains in communication and charisma? Fair gains in communication and charisma, it is amazing to be able to show some of the information that I exposed in the data.

Match 2

Reflections:

1. I tried to do some chess as a mental warmup, but I feel like it left me drained, perhaps next time as a mental warmup, I can try playing chess for creativity not for the win
2. Overall I felt my energy draining in this match. I felt pretty tired.
3. I did some extra work after the match and I feel pretty tired. I felt I needed to squeeze that extra bit out.

Result Calculation:

1. How much do I think this work is worth? $120. It was pretty not special, some of the work I did programmatically could have been done by someone very cheap, but overall I ran tests that required a lot of deep level troubleshooting that is not easy.
2. How difficult intellectually was this work from 1-10? 6-7. It was debugging which can be extremely difficult, especially for someone who doesn’t know my code.
3. What percentile do I place this work in terms of innovation? 5% I don’t know if anything got innovated here.
4. Gains in communication and charisma? Good gains, gets me much closer to the final goal of presenting results.

Match 3

Reflections:

1. Focused a lot on thinking smart not hard
2. I noticed that taking a break is important, staying on the train of thought only makes you want to choose the easiest path, not the most intelligent
3. Changed work time to 15 minutes
4. Still need to let go of going fast in the warmup
5. Like to dance on the breaks

Result Calculation:

1. How much do I think this work is worth? $150. I was able to output results which is worth a ton, but to just hire someone to do this step, it’s probably less money. There was a lot of data and data manipulation involved as well as some troubleshooting.
2. How difficult intellectually was this work from 1-10? The output file is quite complex. I give it a 7 in intellectual difficulty. Not achievable by people of lower intelligence, but easy for people of high intelligence.
3. What percentile do I place this work in terms of innovation? 10% Not much was innovative, the data is quite interesting though.
4. Gains in communication and charisma? I laid the groundwork for much better result communication, I think it was great.

Some more thoughts about my brand for AI Consulting:

1. I want it to have a Youth Venture feel
   • Anything is possible
   • Warm and supportive and inspiring community
2. I want to incorporate these ethe:
   • Never compromise on your vision
   • Move humanity forwards
   • Be science fiction (either in philosophy or technology or both)
3. Inspiring thoughts:
   • Make every business like a Youth Venture business
     • Social enterprise
     • Founders feel purpose in what they do
     • Dream big, prioritize vision
   • Ship fire manual
     • AI that pushed the limit of what is possible
     • Creates our science fiction

Match 1: Video Editing Planning

Goals: I really want to feel less shitty and tired and I want to come up with a direction for my podcast edit and how I can edit it in 40 minutes or less.

Here are the metrics for scoring:

1. Energy rejuvenation (1-5)
2. Confidence in solution (1-5)
3. Creativity (percentile)
4. Raw efficiency, work over energy (percentile)

My plan for my warmup is just for go for a long 15 minute walk.

Plan for work session:

UNIT ONE: Analyze video (10 min)

1. Might want to create a good intro
   • who are you and what have you done
2. What would help her as a writer?
   • Creative process from start to end
   • Talking about book in a way people want to read it or get greater insight
   • Greatest struggles as a writer
   • What like to write about
3. What do other people probably want to know about a writer?
   • Where come up with ideas
   • Interesting passages from book

UNIT TWO: Process/look at other ideas (10 min)

Going all in on Judy Blume masterclass video:

UNIT THREE: Create plan for actual editing (currently thinking one short, one long) (10 min)

UNIT ONE: Gathering clips

UNIT TWO: Gathering broll

UNIT THREE: Compositing

Bonus time: shot list

1. Something really special about Danuta and unique about her personality, show don’t tell. Should be humorous and controversial.
2. Beeroll on books and images from life, maybe emotional points of interview
   • To kill the other
3. Some sort of intro to talk about what this is about (maybe introduction)
4. Something about how she gets started with creative process, or something about art or creativity.
5. Walk through the step by step creative process
6. Images of process
7. Talk about a challenging emotional experience with resolution if possible
8. Deeper philosophical point
9. Some sort of ending

Bonus time: animation thoughts

Trying out pencil 2d!

Postmatch Review:

Overall, this was very fun and rejuvenated my love for editing and video.

1. Energy rejuvenation – 4 I don’t feel 100% but my energy went up TONS since I started working
2. Confidence in solution – 2 I feel the plan is really solid but the timing seems a little tight to get all of this done
3. Creativity – 70th percentile, pretty good, not revolutionary. But I don’t think most people could do this.
4. Raw efficiency, work over energy – 80th percentile, I think most sessions and people can’t be this productive in 40 minutes that was actually insane.

Match 2: Video Editing

Goals: I want to be excited about this video edit, feel satisfied, while boosting my confidence in pushing out videos faster with less effort

Here are the metrics for scoring:

1. Excitement in the edit (1-5)
2. Satisfaction in the edit (1-5)
3. Efficiency (percentile)
4. Fun (1-5)
5. How ME it is (percentile)

My plan for my warmup is to hype myself up – play music, tell friends etc. + motivation.

Clean, write on my board.

UNIT ONE: Gathering clips (10 minutes)

1. Something really special about Danuta and unique about her personality, show don’t tell. Should be humorous and controversial.
2. Beeroll on books and images from life, maybe emotional points of interview
   • To kill the other
3. Some sort of intro to talk about what this is about (maybe introduction)
4. Something about how she gets started with creative process, or something about art or creativity.
5. Walk through the step by step creative process
6. Images of process
7. Talk about a challenging emotional experience with resolution if possible
8. Deeper philosophical point
9. Some sort of ending

UNIT TWO: Gathering broll

UNIT THREE: Compositing

Postmatch Review:

1. Excitement in the edit – 2 I’m not that thrilled about the cut so far
2. Satisfaction in the edit -1 I’m not all that satisfied in the edit
3. Efficiency (percentile) – 60% I’m better than average but a bit slow compared to experienced video editors
4. Fun (1-5) – 3 I had quite a lot of fun
5. How ME it is (percentile) – 15% not a lot of me in it so far

Match 3: Video Editing + MEified

Goals: I was right that the last match did not finish the process of editing. It was just too much. But I did make REALLY good progress. The only problem is, it’s not ME enough. This last challenge, I want to get the edit done, and I want to inject some Jack magic into it.

Metrics for scoring:

1. How ME is it (percentile)
2. Completeness & polish (percentile)

For my warmup, I’m going to watch a bunch of my videos.

Ok the warmup didn’t work, I’m gonna play some nice music and meditate. Me is goofy, profound, soft, and emotional.

UNIT ONE: Compostiting

UNIT TWO: MEify

UNIT THREE: Finalize

Postmatch Review: It ended up taking two hours. I’m tired now!

1. How ME is it – 65% it does feel real, and grounded but not as me as I could make it
2. Completeness & polish – 65% its actually not bad at all, could use some broll and animation

I feel exhausted. My head feels numb. I feel hot and tired. My back aches.

My heart feels heavy. I feel angry at myself. So helpless. My mind in a fog.

My apartment is a mess. I just want to cry.

I can’t work. I just play games all day long. my eyes feel tired.

It’s 2 o’clock in the morning. All I want to do is eat and play video games. The pull is so strong in my heart like there is a strand of honey getting pulled.

I feel a numb panic deep in my chest. I’m afraid of failure. I’m scared I will disappoint myself and everyone around me. Pushing myself to make my business cards is only making me curl up even harder.

It was a long week. I’m exhausted. But the work just keeps coming.

I guess I can cancel tai chi tomorrow. Sleep in.

Tonight I can clean my apartment until I feel more peaceful.

I know I can use the gym as a way to process emotions, but I don’t use it.

I feel this pull, this overwhelm, like the honey being pulled, from my heart.

I’m capable of anything. Even rising from this challenge. This is important because as I get more successful, there will be days I feel exhausted, and in those moments, I need to find a way to find balance, to find peace.

I also want to learn to embrace failure. Failure is so scary to me. There is an image in my mind of my business cards being a complete disappointment and I feel a pit in my heart. A horrible amaturish website I’m not proud of and I can’t fix it.

Everyone starts somewhere. Everyone starts at the beginning. The people who are exceptional, who are savants are not people who started at the middle. They are people who enjoyed the beginning.

But how can I enjoy this? I feel so scared it won’t be good.

Makes me think of this video:

In this video, Jesse talks about how play allows us to feel pressure while still being able to learn.

That fun is the key to this.

But what is the key to fun? What would make this fun for me, regardless of the outcome, what would make designing and drawing fun for me?

What would make it an infinite game, not just a finite game focused on an end goal?

It’s true, the thought of designing business cards does not sound fun to me at all. It sounds like a slog. But maybe that’s because I’m worried about failing.

Ok, what if I tried to merge my painterly style with “woodcut” style prints. What if I created a new drawing technique that I could use to create cool stuff for friends and to sell as products?

That definitely sounds more like play to me.

So what about going to the gym, because I like it so much when I actually go, but I find it hard to go to begin with.

What if I saw it as supercharging myself – which it really is doing. Whether I go to lift weights or just to hang from the bar and stretch it really is building my body up to full potential. It might even solve my sleep problems.

And what about sleep, why do I not want to go to bed? Because if I go to bed, tomorrow, I wake up with tons of problems. Well maybe, that’s not a bad thing. Maybe before I go to bed, I fill my to do list with questions that I want to search out the answers to.

Here are the questions I have today, that if I knew the answers to I would rest easy:

1. What am I going to do about my art coaching and AI gaming companies?
   • Am I behind schedule and if so what do I do about it?
   • Should I extend the schedule?
   • Am I losing money?
2. How do I get out of my procrastination phase and get working?
3. What do I do about my art coaching website?
4. How do I get everything done in such a short period of time?
5. Should I start registering for fairs?
6. Should I pay someone to design the website for me?
7. How am I going to get the motivation to start drawing? How do I start drawing consistently?
8. How do I start going to the gym and working outsite the apartment consistently?
9. How will I start cooking again and cleaning up my apartment? Where will I find the time?
10. How will I prepare for the next week of work? How do I balance my other businesses?
11. When will I continue to work on my Javascript projects? What is the breakdown between AI work time and coaching work time.