Protected: Workpost 3.6: Private Workpost Continued Conversation History

Today, I have many different paths that I can walk down.

I can focus on work. I can spar with my friend, I can go to jiujitsu. I could try to do it all. But I feel weary and tired from not sleeping yesterday. I feel stressed and pressured, and so I want to focus on a few things.

I suppose, first thing is first, I need to focus on work, because without that I cannot be focused tomorrow. Nothing matters until I get that piece done, and once that part is done, all manner of things are possible.

I did indeed get that done, and I feel extremely proud of the work I did.

These days I’m focused on increasing my leverage.

My intuition tells me that three things will unlock the money making potential that my abilities have.

1. Focus. I need to be ok with saying no to more things, focusing on one thing at a time. Lack of focus is creating overwhelm, which in turn costs me my productivity.
2. Fear of rejection. My fear of rejection holds me back from doing things that would instantly make me more money.
3. Youtube and content creation. This is a communication/art skill that has tremendously high leverage if I can figure it out.

Currently, I don’t have much time every day because I go for a run everyday and I am working on my vision and taking care of my health. That means I have perhaps 3 or 4 hours of good working time.

I originally was thinking about giving up or changing this practice I have so I’m less tired and can work more, but I’m actually gonna practice something different, which is saying no to more things.

I feel overwhelmed and exhausted today. I want to finish a lot of things today but I feel overwhelmed thinking about it. Maybe it’s time to process more fears.

I have to finish my work today.

I feel it in the pit of my stomach, my chest this numbing roaring anxiety but also exhaustion and numbness in my head.

I feel like a failure. I’m panicking about not being able to get work done.

One thing that came up for me is that working really hard can help me sleep. All I need to do is fail at creating a package. All I need to complete the deliverable, it doesn’t matter if I do it in a shitty way.

Tony Robbins said to fall in love with your customer.

I want to see my customer succeed. I want to see them happy and thriving. I can make that happen.

I’m afraid to sleep. I’m afraid the day will pass me by.

Not being able to sleep means there is extra energy I have to use. I can use that energy to help my customer and myself. You don’t need to sleep until you feel that release.

I’m afraid I will play Valorant or do something else to cope. I’m afraid the day will pass me by. I’m afraid my addictions will drain me of energy.

Wanting to play Valorant is a sign for massage and addressing some of the physical issues I am experiencing.