Workpost 50: Fundamentals

Byjack

Today is kinda busy and I want to focus on fundamentals – clearing out my todo list, getting all the UNIT ONE things crossed off my list, editing my interview with Danuta Hinc etc.

I also want to focus on the thing that I’ve put off for months, setting up my black out curtains. If I can get that set up today, then I will have accomplished something big.

If I’m able to sort out all the fundamentals. Then the next things to focus on for my business are the following:

  1. AI Consulting mood board
  2. Art coaching sketching
  3. Hubspot and CRM exploration

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Workspace 22: Relax

Byjack

I had a slower start to the day. I started the day on my phone, waking up a bit early because my new retainer is bothering me when I sleep.

I watched some Valorant, talked to my girlfriend, and now I have a flight in about 3 hours. I want to leave in about 2 hours. I still have to take out the trash, eat up some more food and load the dishwasher.

I did a bit of a workout and I found out a couple of things that help with regaining energy, and gathering chi:

  1. Butt-clenched breathing: sounds a bit weird but it works. Lie down, clench the sphincter muscle (what you use to hold in poop) breath in. Then relax and breathe out. Repeat.
  2. Tummy circles: put the left hand over your stomach, then your right hand over that. Make circles over your stomach in the clockwise direction. Do it lightly. Then put your hands in the same area in your back and repeat.
  3. Extremity exercises: this can be any exercise that works your extremities. For example, doing a dead hang and focusing on clenching really hard with your hands but leaving everything else relaxed, or doing heel raises with the tips of your toes super engaged with everything else relaxed.
  4. Meditation: lie down close your eyes and walk down a staircase while counting to 10. Imagine the smell of wet stone, always puts me in a meditative state really quick for some reason.

Anyway goals for today. Just relax! I want to get all the chores sorted out and just spend the rest of my time relaxing.

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Two Important Questions

Byjack

I was thinking about the concept of how Alex Hormzi approaches learning. The idea that you purpose things in a way expecting to fail at first, but you pursue them in such a way that you make it hard for you to fail. That the chances that you will fail is lower than the chances of success.

I was thinking about what made emotional or spiritual success. And that brought me to a few different ideas. They all centered around one thing, the relationship with oneself. I believe that the relationship that you have with yourself dictates the freedom and happiness you have in life. Some ways in which I am not a kind or loving friend or parent to myself are:

  • Thinking my needs are not important, especially if they make it less convenient for other people
  • Shaming myself and comparing myself to other people
  • Lashing out at myself when I’m not the best or successful
  • Yelling at myself for making mistakes
  • Putting on the pressure that if I’m not stressed I will not perform
  • Being disgusted by my weakness

What if I took this idea from Alex Hormzi? What if I accepted I am going to be a shit friend and parent to myself but I am going to ask myself what I need to do to make it harder to be unkind and unloving toward myself than it is to be kind and loving?

Well, what would the most loving parent do for me?

  1. Value my emotions and encourage me to explore them
  2. Hold me close when I’m upset or feeling weak and vulnerable
  3. I am the most important person in their life, they will drop everything if I need them
  4. Be interested in hearing about new adventures and failures and lessons
  5. Does not see me as a static person but as a sum of everything I’ve been, where I’m now, and where I’m headed
  6. Guide me when I’m feeling lost or need to defend myself

I want to know how I can make it impossible for me to not do that for myself.

Some ideas come to mind:

  1. Create a meditative time to watch my own content (read my journals, watch my videos, listen to my recordings). It feels like 1,4 and especially 5. As a side effect, this can create GREAT opportunities for understanding what kinds of videos I can make.
  2. Write down and read my thoughts when I feel lost, scared, angry, ashamed or frustrated. Create a place to feel hurt. This can hit at 1,3, and 4, and maybe 6 if I write responses to things I write.
  3. Work on dance therapy especially the following elements: allowing the world to hold you, inward closing comfort, sensual movement and touch, outward releasing movement

I don’t know how to come up with a strategy on how to mix this in with my life yet but some of my ideas includes:

  • Using therapists as a safe space to practice
  • Using people who are close as a way to practice
  • Using camera off meetings as a way to practice
  • Using youtube videos and coaching as a way to practice

Core Beliefs 1

Byjack

Today I got into an argument with someone who is very close to my heart. Thinking about the argument later makes me think about what is painful about the relationship in general and the core wounds that it brings up.

Core wounds are damaging beliefs that we have about ourselves that we repeatedly look for evidence for (and traumatize ourselves constantly with). 

Cognitive-behavioral therapy teaches us that core wounds can be reprogrammed by finding evidence to the contrary. Thais Gibson recommends doing this for at least 21 days for the new beliefs to set in.

This is day one for me.

Core Wound 1: I’m not good enough (attractive physically and personality-wise)

Evidence to the contrary (I am good enough):

  • A girl in college who was very beautiful who I liked blushed every time I talked to her and liked me back. She was mean to other guys who showed interest.
  • When I was being myself and feeling confident recently, lots of women from girls on the plane, on the trail, at rental properties all seemed really eager to talk to me and help me. I’ve been told I have really good energy.
  • A girl that I love told me she likes the way I look, likes my thin frame and my hands.
  • A girl in high school once had a crush on me after flirting with her once. I might have made an impression on her.
  • A girl who I met playing a mobile game with, added me on her Snapchat and would talk to me for hours, there must have been a reason.

This is a really strong core wound for me. I often compare myself to others and feel like I’m less attractive. I feel that no one really likes me.

Core Wound 2: My emotions are not good and push people away

Evidence to the contrary (My emotions are good and bring people closer):

  • A lot of my art tends to come from my emotions and feelings and lots of people like them
  • Because of my emotions, I tend to be more honest, open and empathetic in support groups
  • I tend to connect with a lot of women by emotions. It’s why I like to have girls as friends and a lot of girls like me.
  • Emotions make me experience things more deeply, like when I cry watching Moana.
  • My emotions help me read other people much better because I can feel what they are feeling.

I always feel, especially with some people, that my emotions are too much and push people away. I worry people like hard and cold unemotional guys since they are stronger and don’t need anything. I also sometimes want to be strong and dominant and I don’t know how to reconcile that with emotions.

Workpost 53: Time to Kick Into Gear

Byjack

It’s time to think through the plan for each of my businesses a little more carefully.

I want to spend 3 months setting up the funnel for each of my businesses and 3 months trying out and running the funnels.

Let’s breakdown what that looks like.

Art Coaching

Start: 7/12 | End: 9/12 | 63 days total

What needs to be done for the funnel:

  1. Payment/banking systems
  2. How much to pay myself vs save for taxes vs reinvest into business
  3. Website
  4. Business cards
  5. Calendly
  6. Client contracts
  7. Mailing lists/CRM

General Aim: To make a beautiful creative world on my website, business cards, social media that reminds me of adventure, magic, and dreams

Next step for MVP…

3 day challenge – Make a mess

By the end of the challenge:

  1. Print out business cards
  2. Have a WordPress website with basic information on it
  3. Figure out how to do scheduling with Calendly

AI Consulting

Start: 7/12 | End: 9/12 | 63 days total

What needs to be done for the funnel:

  1. Payment/banking systems
  2. How much to pay myself vs save for taxes vs reinvest into business
  3. Website
  4. Business cards
  5. Calendly
  6. Client contracts
  7. Mailing lists/CRM
  8. Branding
  9. New contract for funnel

General Aim: To create a place where business owners with the talent and potential can go to unblock their problems

Next step for MVP…

3 day challenge – Create website

By the end of the challenge:

  1. Website that clearly shows brand and services
  2. Clear way to schedule a consultation with me
  3. Be able to talk to local meetups
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Profit In Peace 18: Tired

Byjack

4 AM Again

It is 4 am again

But this time

I feel strange when I wake up

I feel happy when I read her messages

Then guilty

I am so tired

Her emotions are so attractive

My little sloth

Then I remind myself of the feeling

Of being trapped

Unable to leave

Into a life

Alone

Unhappy

Unheard

Anxious

I wonder if it’s her

Or me

That I feel so cold

Alone

I’m trying to understand the right thing to do

But as I write these words

I realize

That the right thing is to sit here

In my depression

Waiting patiently for the answers

To come to me

I Feel Sad

Because I love her

Her emotions like the ocean

I know her

Her little sloth fingers

And I still feel

It is over

I Can Be Brave

I feel overwhelmed

So many emotions

So tired

So much stuff to do

So little time

I tried to keep them down for now

But I realized

I don’t need to

I can work and cry

At the same time

Workpost 52: Exhausted

Byjack

I’m so tired from being sleep-deprived for a few days now.

Today I want to focus on a couple of things:

  1. Completing all the hours of work I want to get done
  2. Focusing on my health
  3. Get screws from Home Depot