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Goal Setting
Today in the King’s council, part men’s group, part coaching session, we talked about setting goals.
I didn’t have an idea of what my goals are but a couple of visions came to mind:
- Coaching is a large part of my life. I saw about 3 coaching conversations with clients or potential clients every week.
- Youtube challenges being a large source of energy in life. I saw myself dedicating a little time every day to focus on an active challenge. This could be writing about the challenge, doing the challenge or shooting videos and thinking about the final video.
- I imagined feeling a lot more confident and in control of my challenges. I saw this as having successfully editing and posted a single challenge to youtube.
- I saw myself being outside and having a lot more energy. I would spend different parts of my day in different places.
- I saw my work-life come alive again. This meant posting posts on Linkedin every week, and engaging with people at work about my life outside of work.
I need to choose three main ones for the intention of the Kings Council.
I will choose the following goals:
- To have a powerful coaching conversation with three more people.
- To have one paying client.
- To have produced three challenge videos and posted them to youtube.
Valorant 24: Looking Forward
I’m thinking ahead to my next goal in Valorant. I think the next step is getting to Ascendant. It is going to take a lot of work just getting back to plat. Here is a VOD review where I got 1 kill the entire game. I reviewed the VOD with my brother’s friend who is a big brained diamond player.
It’s actually interesting, I think I need people who are higher elo but not too much higher because I need someone who can explain a few things, not everything all at once.
Some of the main takeaways from the VOD review on areas I can work on:
- Playing off of teammates (using the analogy of treating them as a sky dog / sova drone / skye cabbage)
- Follow them in
- Use them as a distraction and to gather information
- If they die, no biggie, they aren’t worth anything to me dead
- If I cannot trade, I can just fall off
- Gather notes on what the enemy patterns are
- Think about how they play worked for them in the past rounds
- Peek and clear more confidently
- Don’t be afraid to make noise and util to clear a site, even if they know I’m there, it’s better than planting with no knowledge of where they are
- Use skye binds to peek, don’t waste the util
- Any information on someone in the vicinity or at the areas of no control (at the start of the round, or when we give up control) should be treated with extreme caution
Recap Video Ideas
This is a recap of an exercise I did a few weeks ago. I was watching a ThinkMedia youtube video about how to succeed at youtube. He went through and exercise looking at 3 things in this order: passion, proficiency, and profit.
Basically, he said to make a list of all the things that you are passionate about, either things you like or things you hate, and things you do even if you weren’t getting paid to do it.
My list was:
- Making money
- Finding leverage
- Valorant
- Corporate life (hate)
- Coaching
- Challenges
- Superhuman abilities
- Graphic novels
- Children’s books, fantasy
- Health
- AI
- Surface level thinking (hate)
Then, he said to take that list of things and think about what we have at least 1 year of proficiency in, where we have been doing that thing semi-successfully. So I narrowed down my list to:
- Making money
- Valorant
- Feeling stuck in life
- Deeper thinking
- Coaching
- Health
- AI
Then, he said to narrow down that further into things that we could build an audience around, something people need or would want to buy. Here was my list:
- How to get started with a business
- How to aim
- How to get unstuck in life
- How to unlock your potential
- How to repair your body
- How to use AI to improve your life
I don’t know if I have any interest pursuing youtube in this way, but it was an interesting exercise to reflect on.

Valorant 29: My Valorant Fears and Emotions
I wanted to do a bit of a post to understand how I am feeling right now about the Valorant challenge. I know I feel incredibly stressed, angry, and depressed because I feel like I wasted all my time on Valorant. So much time trying so hard to be good, but nothing seems to really come of it. Sometimes looking at my VODs I feel like my gameplay is the same as it was before.
I don’t really know what is going on and why it seems like I’m new to the game every time. I don’t know why I’m overthinking everything. Why is everything so hard?
I wish I could see major mistakes in my old gameplay.
I guess watching more VOD reviews will help me understand. But that takes so damn long. Maybe it means that there are still opportunities to play much much better. I feel that I maybe have gotten much better but it doesn’t seem to translate over to comp. Maybe it’s also something about understanding the maps better. I really get the sense that I got to plat last time by playing more comfortably on agents and on maps. I think I understood just how to play each map better. But I want to be a more complete player. I want to play with better movement and peeking.
Something else that I feel that I missed out on was just having more posts about the emotions I was feeling. It makes me sad that all my Valorant posts were about techniques and none of them were about emotions.
Valorant has a lot of nice emotions for me. I met my girlfriend on Valorant, I had a lot of friends on Valorant. These days I play mostly alone, but I still like the world. Cool agents and fun to get on to all these different teams. I love it when I have some really fun crazy game sense timing lurks. I guess that is one way that I got significantly better than before.
I wish I had VODs from when I was in iron. I feel that jump from iron to silver was the large one. The jump from silver to plat is weirdly small.
Ok. So I just spent a good hour or so just watching my VODs from bronze until plat then back to gold. I actually feel my overall movement is better and more consistent. The only difference in plat is that I was calmer and held an angle for longer. I also did more wide jiggles. I know for gold I held a lot more angles, and made sure to hold them wide because they would often wide swing everything.
Looking forward, I would be so happy if I kept calm and held angles for longer when moving around the map, held for the wide swing more often. Then when fighting an angle, I want to be more aggressive, swinging very fast and hard, but stopping at the edge and fighting, not leaving until I try to kill them, maybe just letting go of movement keys or crouch spraying. I would love to see my fundamentals get really really good, to a level I know they can get to.
Valorant 27: Confidence
I’ve been thinking more about confidence in Valorant and it actually made me think a lot more about what makes confidence. I originally was interested in how to multitask because I thought that was what would make me stronger in Valorant, but I wasn’t able to find any useful information on it.
I ended up searching multitasking in sports, and I was specifically in interested in the basketball videos when they talked about confidence.
The first video was this:
Ideas:
- Confidence is not about positive or negative thinking
- There are two ways of thinking
- Logically and analytically
- Intuitively
- Confidence is about trusting the second type of thinking
- Timing cannot be thought
Ideas:
- People often rely on outside sources of confidence
- Success
- External Validation
- Comparing ourselves with others
- These outside sources of validation are not reliable
- Confidence comes from being able to trust yourself
- Trustworthiness is from people who follow a code
- Ex: Warrior code “no man left behind” (inspires confidence in your unit because other people won’t leave you behind)
- Ex: Courage over success, valuing courage over failure or success validation
- Code must be specific and have specific actions you take to fulfill it
- Mantras can be helpful
So as they say in the video to do, I am writing down the things I use for confidence in Valorant:
- Success – high KDA, increasing elo
- Comparison – high KDA compared to others, higher rank
- Knowledge and practice – learning techniques and practicing them
- Performance – being able to predict moves, hitting my shots
What I admire in other players:
- Clarity in thinking
- Creative plays
- Fast reactions
- Precise mechanics
- Boldness/confidence
I’ll take each of these a step further to draft out my code. I’m going to see if I can break down what I make each of these things mean:
- I make success mean that I’m smart that I’m special
- I make comparison mean that I’m special, that I’m a valuable or worthy person
- I make knowledge and practice mean I’m smart and that I deserve to be heard
- I make performance mean that I’m special and I’m capable
For the second list:
- I make clarity mean that someone is smart
- I make creativity mean intelligence, specialness, worthy of love and admiration
- I make fast reactions means someone is attractive
- Precise mechanics I make it mean someone is capable, valuable and worth a lot
- Boldness and confidence I make it mean someone is valuable and special
To think about it further my code might need to address:
- Inner value – what is valuable about myself
- Inner specialness – what do I think is special about myself
- Inner love and admiration – what do I love and admire about myself
- Inner capability – what makes myself capable
I don’t really know what my code can be but one aspect that keeps coming up for all of these things are valuing feelings and focusing on radical permission.
Those are two things that I feel make me unique, I value myself and are a way to find freedom and give myself love and admiration.
I suppose I can also focus on the challenge in life, the idea of courage or challenge over success is something else that I admire about value about myself. Deep thinking, letting the answer of hard questions come to me as well.
The ways that I could act out this code in Valorant:
- Check in to how I’m feeling
- Vocalize my feelings
- Check in to how others are feeling
- Let the energy carry action
- Let the plan form in my mind
- Create a challenge at the start of every round
Sova Fanart 1: Class Unit 1 Day 1
UNIT ONE: Sova Model Studies | Day 1 – Portrait
Since this unit was all about model studies, I went into a custom game and used the model as a reference for drawing sova portraits.

I started with this side view of Sova.

Then I did colors:

New rough sketch of Sova:

Followed by a more refined outline:

Then by a painting attempt:

Something wasn’t clicking. I still didn’t like the painting job. I decided to try again and learn from another tutorial on shading.
I tried to color again.

This time I felt something clicked with using large soft brushes and the lasso tool. I used the soft brushes to create nice gradients and the lasso tool for the clean edges. Looking closely at the painter I see that he also uses the smudge tool a lot.